Terrible 3s

I was just telling Jez Ah Ma about how Ace is repeating his terrible 2s or terrible 3s again.


Ace was generally a very sweet kid and did not seem to want to exert his independence at all when he was two... So I always wondered why they said it was terrible... and I even thought it was because I was a very good parent and I gave him lots of choices and so there is no real need to exert his indpendence.


I later realized that it was just because all the things that Ace wanted to do at 2 years old did not bother me much at all and thus, I gave in to him and so, there is no conflict :)


But when he turned three years old, alot of the things that he wanted to do did not sit well with me and what I wanted him to do started not to sit so well with him and he started to go into the "Noooo, nooo nooo nooo" phase..


Now that he is turning 4 and far better at expressing himself.. he will tell you, "Humph, I don't like this.. I dun want that... This is not nice..." and then he will cry and whine and stamp his feet etc...


I do realize that alot of times this happens because we wanted him to do things in a certain way so tat he will convenience us... while we try our best to give in to his free will, there are some times and some things that we cannot give in.


Eg, I cannot give in to his desire to eat bao.. and then after one bite, allow him to waste the bao and ask for chicken rice because to me, this is not acceptable behaviour. This is wasteful behaviour and most importantly, this makes me fat cos i have to eat his leftovers!


And alot of times, I feel upset either me or daddy have to sacrifice and eat what Ace wants to eat because we have to share and he refuses to give in and take turns to eat what the other person likes to eat... Eg, when he is in the noodles phase, in insisted on eating noodles everyday. Now that he is in the rice phase, he insisted that he cannot eat anything else...


I just which this phase will go away soon. I know it is just part of growing up..


Anyway, I subscribe to Baby Centre's newsletter and the other day I was reading an article on the terrible twos or the terrible threes... and someone commented that their children are now 13 and 14 and they go through yet one more found of exerting their independence.


When I think back of my growing up years, I think it is true that when I reached 13,14, I was somewhat a little more rebelious because I was finding myself and my true identity and I wanted to be different.. blah blah blah...


But what I also noticed is that when people reach 23,24, they go into a quarter life crisis and go into the terrible 3s all over again! hahahaaha.. cos they will want to do things their way, purposely come home late even though they know their parents are worried...


So what about 33 and 34? After discussion, me and Jez agree that there will be no more terrible 3s.. because their children will help them act it out by then! hahahaha....


Anyway, I do wonder how I would react when my son is going through that age? How would I react if my son or daughter stays out late, if they have unkempt long hair that looks UGLY to me, if they want to have tattoos, if they dun want to study or do biz and just want to have fun, etc...


Well, I guess I can only remind myself to what I do best. No matter what happens, be their best friend...



Previous Post: Holiday Sensor