Friday, May 13, 2011

WP Rally

Because I was in Malaysia for the Lions Club Convention, so leh, I missed the rally that was held in bedok stadium over the weekend.. when I came back, I tried to catch up online but felt it is not the same as being there.. so secretly hoped tat there would be another rally... There was.. but it was a PAP rally which I heard is usually boring.. and then Jo jio me to go to Serangoon Stadium for Worker's Party's Rally with her and since got kaki, I agreed to go... as you can tell, most of the pple who are supporters are old uncle types like our fathers...

So many pple and the stage so far away.. I could only HEAR them and couldnt see them at all... too bad they got no budget for huge screens...

People mountain people sea...


I was told there were 30,000 people there that day.. even when I left at 9.30pm, there were MORE PEOPLE coming into the stadium...


Jo very lucky and managed to pick up a WP flag onthe floor cos by the time we reached, it was already sold out!!!!!!

There were also pple selling hammers outside.. as long as you paid, they will pump it up for you on the spot...

This uncle even made his own hammer...with LED lights somemore... but leh, we think it looks more like a peanut than a WP hammer:) hahahahha

When I told my son I would be going out, he started to whine. I know it would be easier to say I am going for a meeting and he probably will not want to come along if I said I were going for a meeting. But remembering how the best parent and child relationships were built on trust and honesty, i decided to tell him the truth.. tat I was going to the rally...

As expected, my son had wanted to come along.. I tried to explain to him that it would be very hot and he will need to walk alot and there will be no food or water.. so I cannot bring him and I choose not to bring him.. but he just cried and cried and cried non stop... no matter how I explained he just cried and cried and said, "I want to be with you, I want to be with you.. I want to be with you..." When i told him he needed to walk alot.. he would say, "I can walk I can walk! I want to be with you..." and continued to cried...

So I softened and really thought about bringing him.. cos I thought it might be good exposure for him too... but time is short and he hasn't had dinner yet.. and then i remembered to be a good parent who understands and respect my kid's needs... so I told him to please stop crying because I want to talk to him and discuss something with him...

I told him then that I would bring him if he is okie to not have food, drinks or toilet for the next 5 hours... and I meant it..

After thinking for two seconds, he said, "Okie, I dun want to go already.." and stopped crying just like tat! :)

Maybe the PAP government should learn a lesson from this... sometimes crying children just want to be heard and want their choices to be respected.. when you do show tat you hear and care.. you will find that most children are capable of making their own good decisions.. and even if it is a bad decision, they have to learn to bear the consequences themselves.. which will only train them to make better decisions in future:)

The best sort of parent with the happiest sort of children are parents who have a horizontal relationship with their children... parents who are equals with their children. Granted that our children are young and need guidiance as they do not have the experience that we have, and they might not be ready to lead the family in the right direction... but tat doesnt mean that this is a good reason to have a top down relatioship with our children... guiding them and sharing our experience is indeed not the same as telling them what to do. Leading your children the right way need not mean you need to become god and have your children follow your every whim and fancy because your wish is their command...

Telling our children what to do puts us in a top down position and it assumes we are more superior than our children. When parents put themselves in such a position, they would only call out for MORE authority conflict where our children will for sure show their unhappiness.. if not now, then much later.. (say, 50 years later by voting a beloved and important minister like George Yeo out of Aljunied GRC)

What is done cannot be undone.. even as a parent, I cannot say that I always make the best decision or always do things out of love...

So therefore I have to bear the consequences of having my son sometimes going in the opposite direction I ask him to... having him tell me that he hates me and doesnt want to be my friend anymore...

But thankfully, it is never too late to really care. It is not too late to realize also that when your children "attack" you and tell you that they hate you or complain about you, it is all really just a call for your attention and love. The way out of this is just responsiveness.. responsiveness means understanding their need and give them what they need... if Ace is needing a hug, I give him a hug.. if he needs me to sing to him, i will sing to him.. if he needs a listening ear, I sit down and listen to him...

My PAP government, my dear "father" , PM/MM/SM Lee, are you listening?:P

PS: I wrote this before the new cabinet list and the resignation of the MM and SM were announced. I am so happy to know my "father" IS listening :P

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