Thursday, July 21, 2011

Master Ace On The Power Of Hugs





Everyday, Ace will ask me to hug him... if he is happy, he wants a hug, if he is unhappy, he also wants a hug. Everyday he will ask for hugs non stop.. sometimes up to 30 times a day:) It seems like he never has enough of hugs...

But I guess it is because of Ace's very loving nature. It is just great tat he is this way and I always ask him if he will still continue to hug and kiss me when he grows up and he said, "Of cos!"

The other day, I asked him why does he need so many hugs everyday and why does he like me to hug him so many times in a day and so Master Ace expounded the value of hugs in a few simple sentences....

"I want to hug because I like it when you hug me.... When I am feeling unhappy and you hug me, you will send love to me and when you send love to me, I will feel better and feel happy. (And here comes the killer) And when I am happy, I will be very 乖lor..."

And he can't have put it in better words!



As a parent, the power of hugs are invaluable...

Our children will meet obstacles and may have traumas or heartbreaks along the course of the day.. someone may have bullied them or they may have felt like a failure at something.. or maybe they just fell down and scrapped their knee etc... but there is nothing a good hug cannot result.. a good hug is like the figurative "Mothers' Lap".. it is a station where your children recharge and heal themselves of these little "injuries".. this is the reason why after you kiss a boo boo, your children feel better instantly...

One teacher and friend of mine, a very successful parent (the same one tat taught me about The Mothers' Lap... her children just adore their parents and treat them as their favourite best friends), taught me this powerful exercise called joining. She says that in the course of our day, we will have many situations where we forget to do the right thing or may have hurt our children with our actions or our words unknowingly... all these add up and create a distance between us and our children... and over time, this distance will slowly accumulate and create a up down relationship.. which upon reaching their teens and gaining independence, the way our children fight back would be to rebel....

So leh, to be a good parent, it is best to erase all the mistakes tat we make every single day by joining with our children before they sleep..and it is simply as simple as hugging them to sleep and continuing to hug them (even when they are already asleep) and energetically joining them till you feel the two of you wrapped in the warm embrace of intimacy...

If you practice enough and open your heart, you will also be able to feel understand what your children are feeling when you hug them and have a clue to what could be bugging them and what has been causing the non stop tantrums or crying or watever tat happened in the day...

Anyway, on this hug hug topic.. right after I finished writing this, my son giggled and showed me this.. he says this is a sign to tell me that he needs his hug of the day...

When I laughed and hugged him, he came back with another sign 10 minutes later.. wahahahah...

Now, his favourite game is to write "I love Hugs" on paper and paste on his shirt with a scotch tape... he says whenever I go near him, I have to hug him because that is his sign that he wants hugs... i think we hugged more than 50 times yday because of this and so as a result, he is in super good mood... everything I say.. he will do... wahahahahahahahhaahha...:)

So remember... the power of hugs:) Parents, make good use of this very positive tool:)

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