Whiny Ace

Being a parent really takes loads and loads of patience. For just ONE idea to get through their head, we need to patiently repeat one thousand times.

When they finally heave a sigh of relief, only to find that they will forget it soon enough if we do not reinforce the idea.

Ace has been going out alot more often these days and mixing around with more kids. One of the things in common in most of the kids that we met is that they will cry and whine for the things that they wanted.

Seeing that Ace did not have much reaction to them, I did not reinforce and tell him that that is not right and that if he were to express himself properly, I would still give it to him if I could.

Somehow though, after repeated exposure... he got the idea that that is another strategy to get what you want and then he proceeded to go into the whiny mode. Everything you refuse to give him, he whines and cries. This has made me and Daddy almost lose our cool quite a few times.

After repeated repeats of how we like it when he smiles and we will give it to him if he asks for it properly, things are getting better already.

Daddy told me the other day that when he was really young, he whined to Yeye and Yeye was so angry that he took a cane, whacked him so hard that he bled and locked him in the storeroom. "From then onwards... no more whining from me..."

When we talked about this incident while eating supper with Yeye and Nainai, Yeye has completely forgotten about the incident. But Nainai remembers it clearly. "From that day onwards, whenever he has tears, it flows inside into his tummy.." Nainai says.

"Hahaha.. and then now got to spend alot of money go POV and heal and learn to express your feelings out again.."I laughed at Dadddy.

But having said that, having been in that situation as Yeye did, I guess Yeye just felt helpless and did not know how to deal with all the bad feelings and i believe it to be a feeling of guilt because when Daddy was young, Yeye did not have as much time for him and did not take much care for him that he would like. And on Daddy's side, probably has guilt as well.. if not, why would he create such a situation where his Dad will hit him so bad when he was so young, right?

Anyway, we started discussing if Yeye will do this to Ace if he whines. "I think not... cos I think grandparents love their grandchildren in a different way as compared to loving their child."

"Of course not!" said Yeye when we asked him what he thought. "You are the parents, you should be the one disciplining him. As grandparents, we just love him, sayang him and play with him."

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