A financial issue came up today... That, is Ace crying.. over the financial issue...
Ace had a chocolate sale in school and he said he wanted to bring 20 dirhams to school to buy chocholates... According to the email I received from the class mum, the money goes to charity.. so I said OK.. he can take money from his piggy bank...
When he came home from school, the first thing he said to me when he got off the bus was, "Mummy, I gave my friends my money..." which made me upset for a few reasons..
Number one, I was afraid he was bullied...
Number two, I have bad experiences related to the linking of the words "school", "friends" and "money" relating to an incident that happened in kindergarten which created a big hoo ha among teachers and parents...
Number three, I just had a talk with him about helping people the night before and how we cannot help people by just giving them money... I wondered if Ace listened to me or understood wat I said at all!
And number four.. I dun think at his age it is right to give ANYONE money in school for tat matter!
But I made a mistake of not verifying the details... something just ticked in me and so, he kenna a big ticking off from me about how I am ok that he buys things for his friends but I dun condone giving children money and how I already explained to him that you cannot give people money just because you think you can help them... blah blah blah.. and I told him the money was meant for the charity chocolates, how can he use it on other things.. in that case, he shouldnt bring any more money to school in future...
The more I scolded him though, the more lost I got. Reason being, I realized that I am not particularly rich and while I do not worry about money now, I do not have as much money in the bank as I would like ... and while I have taken years to learn about money, what is good attitude about it and how to manifest or more of it, I have been basically someone with lots of scarcity thinking in my entire life! Even when I make $20K in a month once, my habit was still to check out the prices before i ordered ANYTHING! I had to make effort to order wat I like.. not wat i thought my bank or pocket liked:) How the hell am I going to teach Ace how to be abundant and how to keep or manage his money? I know MONEY IS LOVE.. and how do I explain it to him? How do I tell him when it is ok to give money and when it is not ok...
And so I went rambling off to cover up all the thoughts I had and realized that he was not listening to me but staring at the leg of the table.. so he kenna one more round of scolding from me.... so he started to cry again...
But after the second launch of the tsunami, I finally let out enough steam to remember to find out the details of how he spent and what he spent his money on... and I also remembered that it is HIS money tat he gave away.. not mine! I actually have no business in how he wants to spend it!
And when I did finally put my anger away to find out exactly what happened, it turns out that I was basically worrying for nothing! I had forgotten that my little boy is Mr Abundance and Love... he was here as my son not cos I was to teach him about money.. he was here to teach ME about money and how money is LOVE!
After a little more question and answer, I found out that here is how he spent his money..
15 dirhams- chocolates (for charity)
1 dirham- brought home cos it was leftover
1 dirham- Paid to James cos James bought a chocolate for 5 dirhams and resold it to Ace at 1 dirham to Ace cos he wanted to give Ace a 4 off... (good investment actually for Ace)
1 dirham he gave to Fergus cos he would be leaving Horizon School for good to go Canada and so he gave him the 1 dirham as a souvenir as in "see this 1 dirham and think of me)
1 dirham he used to buy Jasmine a bottle of drink cos it was playtime and she was thirsty and did not have a bottle of water with her.
The only 1dirhamn I can really fault him for was that he also used one dirham to buy one bottle of water when he had a water bottle filled with water.. so tat is a waste of money.. hahaha:)
When I found out that I cannot blame him for anything other than tat bottle of water.. I apologized to him for making a big fuss and getting angry before hearing his explanation..
But I was sure unsure where or how to approach this. I mean his way of giving money is a form of showing love. What he did is not wrong but.. but... but... the scarcity bitch in me JUST cannot tahan the thought of giving money away... wahahahaha;)
I told him later that I am aware it is HIS money and he should be free to spend it anyway he likes.. "But, good money habits start young and if I do not tell you what to do or what not to do with your money and you were to go giving it away freely without any thought, will you become the rich man like like you want to in the end?" And after I said that, I felt it was not very "correct" as well.. and did not come across as what money is all about as well..
So I explained to him tat i am ok with him being helpful but I am not so ok with him thinking tat being helpful is giving people money.. he can share the chocolates he bought.. and he can buy things to give other people if he wants, it is his money.. but I dun like it tat he gave people money freely cos tat is not the way to do things.. he could have made a card for the one who is going away.. or bought a present...
As i was writing this, I suddenly saw it.. that there was actually no need to change him or scold him or do anything about this incident at all.. because money is love... it is just a form of energy, when given out in love, it always returns back to you multiplied by the amount that you gave out... (that is why one of my teachers taught us to say to our money, "Money money... please come back and bring more of your brothers and sisters to you.. I love you... " whenever we use cash to pay for something...)
Ace was just giving out the money with love:)
So I went to him and talked to him about it and told him I am very sorry that i was such an ass. I should have just trusted him and now that I think back, what he did was very right and very good and that i learnt a good lesson from him.. "Sorry, Ace..."
"It's ok.." Saint Ace replied.. "You don't have to say sorry to me mummy.. I don't need your sorry.. I just want your love..." And with that, we ended this chapter beautifully with a big hug and a big kiss:)
Thanks Ace, it was a lovely lesson:)
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