Tuesday, March 03, 2015

What Will You Do If I Die


During our before the bedtime chat today, Ace asked me... "What will you do if I die, Mummy?"

I told him that if he died, I will be very very sad... But I will try my very best to lead a very good and happy life because I know that is what he will want me to do and I will remember him, continue to love him and keep him in my heart.. forever..."

Then I asked him why he asked me this question.

"Mummy, I asked you this because I was thinking about the children I know who lose their parents or parents who lose their kids.. I wonder why so many of my friends do not have mothers or fathers.." said Ace and he started to cry as he felt for his friends.

I told him not to cry. I told him the reason why he has many friends like this is perhaps because for children to lose their parents, it is often a very very very painful process... Just like how he will feel if I were to suddenly go away or pass away.

As he is someone who has a gift of sharing alot of love with people, he can be their friend, and send lots of love to them and provide them with alot of comfort to make this pain less painful.

Then he shared that one of his classmates J does not have a mother. "Do you know why?" I asked him.

He said he doesnt know and doesnt dare to ask.. "This sort of question so sensitive, I think I need to be friends for 3 years then can ask.. Last time in Dubai, I only asked after we were friends for a 3 years..." I told him dun need lah. His mother me can meet for 3 minutes and ask already.. hahahahaha:) Cos I got gift of making people feel very comfortable around me :)

I said one way he can do it is to ask and open ended question like, "What happened to your mother?" And then after listening.. say, "I am so sorry to hear about that.."

"Like that can meh?" He asked.

"Can lah... but you must respect them if they not comfortable to share lah. This is gentle way of asking... it is not like you ask them, "so, your mother die ah?""

"But mummy, that is what I asked my friend in Dubai leh.."

Wahahahaha.. no wonder he needed 3 years to ask :) So blunt.. wahahaha.. but I think also his sincere honesty is moving in its own way and so it worked too:)

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