I Think My Best Friend Understands

My teacher Jeff Allen said that we should always treat children like our best friends. "If you are not feeling ok, let them know... no matter how young they are, they can understand that..."

Recently, I have not been feeling too good....Something happened in my life and it resulted in a series of departures, betrayals, disappointments, war, pain... It's like deja vu all over again...

Ok, there is nothing wrong between me and Max.. rest assured ;) Let's just say it is not a marriage issue...

The end result was that I end up spending alot of time at home with Ace. All these pent up emotions were all also suppressed inside me. Didn't help that for some unknown reason, my son has gotten into a whiney stage where he would keep saying, "mummy.. mummy... mummy..." and keep asking where is his daddy like one thousand times a day... And when he doesn't get his way, he cries or whines....

It is like everyday when he wakes, he only has one mission... TO OPEN HIS MOUTH... and it is either to eat, sing or whine... I am ok with eating and sometimes when i need peace and quiet, not so ok with the singing. The one I really cannot stand is the whining...

Max told me the other day that he noticed that I have been shouting at Ace alot lately.

"Wah lau, you try spend whole day with whiney Ace lah..."I retorted him..

"Aiyoh, dun need to defend yourself lah.. I am not saying you are not good, I am just telling you my observation..." he said.

I was really angry when I heard that.. I was so angry I contemplated not talking to Max.

Firstly, I felt like i was attacked... and then the ego voice in me said, "You can scream and shout at Ace as and when you like it and I cannot is it? Everything you can do to Ace, you can slap him, and shout at him loudly, threaten him.. I cannot is it??? Just who are you to say tat about me?"

But thankfully, my higher mind asked me, "What are you so upset about? If you do not think the observation is true, then dun need to be angry mah.. Barney also say, learn from your mistakes.. just do better lah..." And so instead of staying angry at Max, I just reflected on what I could do better and somehow, after this reminder from Max, I discovered myself becoming more patient the next day..

Maybe it is a compensation.. I don't know.. I apologized to Ace and he was cool and he hugged me and told me, "I love you!"... anyway, I think my best friend, Ace understands lah.. Thanks, Ace, Thanks Max!

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