So Ace was telling me about school and then suddenly, he heave a very xian sigh... and I asked him what happened..
"It was a bad day today.." he declared.. "Cos we were divided into teams and I had to do the project with pple I hate!"
So I asked him who he had to do the project with. Apparently, he was doing the project with his classmates D and M. As D is somewhat of some little genius, he was bossing Ace around and kept asking Ace to change seats and because Ace had to change seats, he couldnt finish the project part that he was in charge of.. which was the flowers in the middle of the large poster they were supposed to make...
And he was upset at M because M kept poking him with a pencil to get his attention...
So I explained to him that this was a chance he learnt to tell others what he thinks.
First, I asked him if he did tell M that he did not like to be poked with a pencil? He said he did not. and so I explained to him that M might not know it is annoying him. So he has to tell M to please stop doing that because I don't like it, "Just call my name and I will answer you... or tap on my shoulder.." I asked Ace to say..
As for D, I asked him if he agreed with what D is thinking and he said he felt it doesnt make sense and is a waste of time to change seats all the time. So I asked if he told D and he said he did not.. he was just super annoyed by it...
Then i explained to him that he had to learn to share his feelings and share what he felt. "You have to explain to D why you think this is a bad idea and explain to him that you needed to stay in that seat to finish up the project..." i told him..
And then I explained to him how projects work. I told him that projects are a work related event where different people come together to complete the same goal. Sometimes, when you are grown up already and working or running a business, you may not get to choose who are the people you work with.. OR you may not know how people react or behave till you start to work with them.. so you don't always work with people who think like you...
Therefore, it is important to learn how to share your thinking and how to say NO to an idea that you feel will not help the group achieve the goal they have set.
"The most important thing in the project, is that you get your goal achieved by the deadline you set... So Ace, in this case, you have to think like a leader. As a leader, it is your job to make sure your team finishes the project by the deadline and that you achieve your goal.. so what can you do or what can you say to the other team members, how can you say it so that they will be willing to listen and follow so that you can achieve your goal?"
I know that is a general guideline but I feel he has to start thinking by himself and as parents, it probably is also helpful for both ourselves and the kids tat we trust they can settle it by themselves...
Seems though that he could work out the issue by himself anyway... two days later, he told me that he had been awarded housepoints... 2 points for being creative and making their poster pop out like a 3D image... and another 2 points of being kind to his team mates...
Yeah!:)
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