I Will Tell The Truth

I made a mistake of leaving the scissors around after Ace finished with his craftwork the other day.

So after dinner, when Ace was doing one of the worksheets which required him to cut and paste some things, I found it strange that the scissors was no longer where it was on the table cos I just saw it there a while ago. And no matter how I searched, I could not find it.

"Ace, did you see the scissors?"

Ace gave me an innocent look and told me, "I don't know..." Because he did not blink, did not look away or look guilty.. and even looked at me straight in the eye with no hesitation at all, I believed him.

And then, I finally found the scissors at the dining bench and beside the scissors, I found my green Esabee recyclable bag with the straps cut into two.

"Ace, do you know who did this?"

Again, without blinking, looking away or looking guilty, Ace repeated his mantra, "I don't know..."

"Ace, I give you one more chance. Mummy dun like little boys who tell lies. I like little boys who tell the truth. If you tell me lies, I will get more angry... Who cut this into two?"

"I don't know.... YOU?" He said.

So I went down on my knees so that we were eye level to eye level. "Ace, come, I want to talk to you. (he knows this means he has to get ready for some prep talk) Ace, look at me in the eyes. Tell me, who cut this into two... I only like little boys who tell the truth...."

He started to look guilty and turn away. "I don't know..." he insisted.

"Did YOU cut this into two?" and then with his eyes downcast in shame, Ace nodded his head.

"Ace, you know that mummy don't like little boys who tell lies. I like it when you tell the truth. If you do something, you must have the courage to admit it and say you are sorry. Because you told the truth, mummy will not punish you."

And then I hugged him and told him that he did great in telling the truth. "I like honest boys... and remember, if you lie, mummy will always know and always find out in the end, so it will be better to tell me the truth because mummy would be angrier if you tell lies...."

So after a while, he was back to normal and he told me later, "Mummy, I will tell the truth. I will be a good boy..."

Max asked me what I did since he did cut up the bag. I just let it go lah.. the bag is not worth much anyway but I did explain to Ace that this bag is a recycle bag and is very useful. Now that he has cut it, we cannot use it and so it creates wastage on earth...

But I guess what made it scary is the fact that my son is so young but he can lie without blinking. I wonder which area in my life am I not being honest with to have my son do this at such a young age... usually, I write my emotions on my face and it is not difficult to read me.. I also have great difficulty in lying because I always feel a pang of guilt which shows on my face... that is why I rarely lie and if I do.. I always take great care to ochestrate and rehearse the lie beforehand (I am unfortuantely also quite a good actress) so that I would not be found out.

Of course, like one of my favourite teachers, Mrs HE Lee says, "Honesty is the BEST policy..." I have also discovered that it is always better to be upfront and be honest then hide and lie. So over the course of my life, I have started to lie purposely lesser and lesser... but i still occasionally do tell a white lie here and there..

I guess as adults, it is so easy and a part of life to do a white lie here and there. Especially to our children becuase it is a convenient way of not giving in to them and avoiding tantrums they might throw if you told them nothing but the whole truth.

It is much harder to say it as it is and not lie about ANYTHING... if you do not believe me.. try talking for one day and saying everything exactly as you see and think it without elaboration and without exclusion of important details and you will see what I mean. It is so tough.. but it is so important for the peacefulness in our hearts.

I guess this is just a good reminder for me to seek and stick with the truth... Afterall, my internet nick, Verity, actually means "Truth" ;)

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