No One Likes To Be Nagged At

No one likes to be nagged at. Not even Ace.

My little 5 year old got fed up the other day and ask my grandma "Can you stop it?!"


At night, while we were having our before bedtime conversation, he told me, "Mummy, can you ask Popo and Zhen Popo to stop jiang wo (nagging at me)? They keep saying about me and keep saying... everyday keep saying.. so chao chao nao nao (noisy). Zhen de shi shou bu liao.. (I really can't stand it anymore...)"

I guess though that is a mistake that most Asian parents make. As a parent, we dun want our kids to "do the wrong things" and so we are perpetually trying to tell them what to do and what not to do so as to "protect" them... instead of helping them though, we are pushing them away from us with all that nagging.

I really marvel at Lency when she said that she never tells her kids what to do all the time.. not when they get into quarrels (she just requests them to please settle it themselves in Daddy's office), not when they are frens with the worst kid in school (She just asked if he could make his own decisions all the time instead of letting his friend decide because she knows she trusts him)..

Lency says we just need to trust our kids and they know the best thing to do at the best time. Her son was basically taking care of himself and cooking his own meals and washing his own clothes as a form of helping out by the time he was 13.

Alas, it is not easy to remember NOT to nag:) Hahahaha.... Maybe it is the way we were brought up, maybe sometimes we let our emotions get better of us..

I explained to Ace that both the grandmothers nag because that is their way of showing love. It is not the best way to show love but because no one told them before that they can also show love through trust and hugs... they only learnt to show love this way.. and I reminded him of the things they have done for him and asked him if he agreed that they love him.. and he nodded his head...

Meanwhile, I went to my grandma and asked if she can cut Ace some slack. I explained to her that if we keep nagging, Ace gets immune to it and will no longer want to listen to us even when we are telling him things that matter. I told her I understood it is her way of showing love but we can trust him to do the best things..

My grandma just said, "Aiyah, he is always grumpy like that one lah.."

She did however cut him some slack that day and Ace also stopped complaining.. let's hope this keeps up ;) Hahaha

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